DIDN'T SEE IT COMING!

Written by Captain Mary on Saturday, April 09, 2011

After the passing of my husband, my dear friend Frank stepped in to help. He knew both of us for a long time. Frank had been my friend for close to 30 years. I always considered myself part of the family. A friend that you could always depend on. We grew even closer for awhile and he was around almost everyday. During hurricane season he stopped by with gas for the generator, dropped off bottled water. But I wasn't the only house, he made his rounds to all of his friends lending a hand. If I ever had a problem, he would be the one who could fix it. A remarkable man, who is lost from this life now.

This year seems to be abundant with loss of friends and family, but Frank's passing, well, I didn't see it coming! Sitting at my desk, doing my usual morning routine, my phone rings and it is a friend I haven't heard from in awhile. She makes idol chit chat before telling me the horrible news, Frank has passed away, she had no details for he was just discovered a matter of hours ago. As the day went by the details started to fall in place. I emailed his sister and she returned a message which I didn't understand. It was clear that I had to speak with her.

Later in the evening I got a call from Betty, she gave me the story of what she thinks happened. The scene was set first when his job called to see where Frank was. He never misses work and his boss and girl friend had become concerned. His girl friend said that she had the key to his house and would stop by to see if he was alright. She approached the house with his car parked out front, opened the door and I imagine found all his important documents laid out, with a note saying "Stop, call the police, don't' go upstairs it is messy, Sorry, Love Frank" or something to that effect. His girl friend walked upstairs anyway, as anyone would have. She stood and witnesses a scene that I dare to imagine. For Frank had shot himself, and no one saw it coming. The image that his girl friend now stores in her brain will never fade.

Still talking with Betty, she told me of his depression after the passing of his sister then his mother. After his mother he just didn't seem to snap back. They were very close and spent time together each and every day, the were an integral part of each others lives. His health was becoming complicated, yet nothing that couldn't be managed. I know that getting older we all have things that get us down. Our bodies become worn out in places, its just the way it is. Than he found that he was having trouble sleeping, and sought the help of a doctor to suggest a remedy. That remedy was Ambien, a drug know to have substantial side effects, such as depression, hallucinations, thoughts of suicide. I have seen the add on television. Well, apparently that is exactly what happened. Recently he even had his dosage increased, because it really wasn't working either. But something was working in his brain, enough to have him put a gun to his head and pull the trigger. I understand that this is graphic, but what is worse is to have your loved one suffer this same fate and you find their tortured soul abandoned.

I would love to tell everyone that if you take this drug, find another way to get some sleep. Don't be so concerned as you get older that you don't sleep as many hours. I for one has just accepted the fact that if I sleep four hours in a row I am doing great. Don't let your children take this drug, no matter how much you want them to be relieved. This drug is very dangerous. I went on the Internet and looked for stories such as this one and I found an endless supply of horror stories related to Ambien suicides.

I can recall the advertisement on television, with the lady sleeping peacefully on her bed, with little Ambien wings fluttering behind her and peaceful illusions of a wonderful restful sleep. The one thing they don't put on the advertisement is that this peaceful sleep can become permanent.

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  1. 1 comments: Responses to “ DIDN'T SEE IT COMING! ”

  2. By Anonymous on April 10, 2011 at 8:09 AM

    I am so sorry, suicide is not the answer...... no question can be that hard...... the thought now that he is with his sister and mother is the only good thing to come from this.....