Written by Captain Mary on Saturday, September 13, 2008

I know that the Economy is going badly for everyone and I think I waited too long to trim the fat on my budget, but I thought I had more time. Unforeseen circumstances hit me yesterday and I fell apart along with my world. It would be so easy if I lived on a nice plot of land independent from the power company, the phone company, the water company and the government and just live my life as the happy person I strive to be. I could grow my own food and barter with my neighbors for goods we could exchange.

I am not one who asks for help, but the time came and I made some phone calls to friends. I got some good advice and a place to go and cry. My friends have never seen me cry and I image it was disturbing, my face really gets contorted and ugly. I tried to find a way out of my immediate dilemmas and my friends helped me out. I went through my jewelry to find enough to take to the pawn shop, and I came upon my husbands wedding rings. When I put the rings in my hand I could see his face and the worries he had for me while he was dieing, he asked me "will you be able to make it without me", so that he would go in peace I told him that I would be fine.
So many years have passed and I made good on my promise, but now I need him again. I feel so alone today. I know that I am not alone and I am so glad that I have the people in my life that I have. My daughter knows me and when she called last night she made sure she told me she loved me. I spent the evening at my friends Castle and I always feel like I am protected there, as nothing can penetrate the walls of the Castle. Inside I am protected by the security of the surrounding moat and the guardians of the Castle. But, I can't stay in the Castle, so today I will pick myself up and do what I need to do to get my life back.
Life is so full of tests and I will pass this one too.

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  1. 3 comments: Responses to “ WHEN LIFE FALLS APART ”

  2. By Anonymous on September 13, 2008 at 10:14 AM

    I seem to have the oddest luck. When the economy is good I generally do good but when it's really bad I do really well. There might be some rough spots in between (Spent 29 months unemployed spread among various points since the year 2000).

    Finally lucked onto my first six figure job. I'm still astounded.

    Hopefully things will get better for you.

  3. By Queenie on September 13, 2008 at 2:13 PM

    Awww Mar, You can always hang at the castle. Next weekend, a "Life blows, lets drink" party here. Ok?

    I am glad that I am holding those rings here. You can't get rid of them. You know that we will take care of you.

  4. By Anonymous on September 13, 2008 at 10:11 PM

    what the hell are u talking about.

    Warm wishes from crystal river!!!!!!!! I miss you all!!!!!! Love Mel and charl